N0thing's H0tter ~

Be my guest.

First of all, thank you for visiting my blog during your freetime. Hope you enjoy your time ^^
Be sure to squash some tomatoes along your way =)

What I wanna tell you.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

i've been staring at the screen for at least half an hour thinkin how should i start, there is juz too much things in my mind i wanna frustrate. i had a seriously bad day today (13/1) basically im already troubling over a friend's love problem becuz im somehow involved. To make things worst, the traffic police gave me a call during my work and inform me about my dad was brought away by the police due to a past accident he haven settled and i hav to bring a bailer (my mum) down to bail him out. i became realli moody after the call, i had no motivation to work at all. To make things EVEN worst, a lady came and complain to me about our products saying that we made a mistake blahx3, becuz it wasnt me that served her, i couldnt do anything, plus we did not make a mistake at all. Then she throw her temper on me instead, saying wat the girl nv explain to her the details and wat she is very busy and she has to waste her time on this kind of shit, and then critisize our management. Whoa i tell u, i was realli about to snap already, it wasnt my fault so why she is throwing everything on me, im her venting machine ah ? i controlled myself and tell her nicely again, she gave me that oh-so-scary face and then walked away. Whats more, the business was seriously bad, whole freakin day the sales not exceeding 80 dollars. i didnt even wanted to sms this kind of sales to my manager at the end of the day. its like givin him the impression im not working seriously. i even cut my thumb merely by opening a bottle of water chestnut. i am seriously down on my luck. Later on i rushed home straight after work and skipping my dinner becuz i hav to bring my mum down to bail my dad out. When we reached there my mum is required to sign a bail bond form which states clearly if my dad fail to attend the court she hav to pay the amount of 10k or if she fails to pay she has to be imprisoned for not more then 6 months. After she sign it i saw her eyes went red, deep inside me i knew it right away, that is becuz shes got another matter to worry despite the problems we are having already. Looking at my frail and aged mother tearing, my heart seriously sank. My mother is the breadwinner of the family and she still has to take care of the family. Do u guys noe how tough is it for a near 60 women to still support a family like that ?! Hasnt she has enough problems to worry already ?! What more does my father wan from us !? How long more can my mum be with me before she collapse !? How much more does she needs to suffer before she can enjoy her life ?! Lookin at her white hair and wrinkled face, my eyes went red, my nose felt so sour. My mum had suffered till now becuz of my dad. I realli wanted to cry. But im bitting my teeth and clenching my fist so hard to hold my tears. I tell myself im a man, i shed blood but not tears. But how long can a man's pride hold him out ..? How many of u out there can truely understand my sorrow ? As the only child, i felt so useless.. so helpless .. All i can do now is work part time job to liften my mum's burden becuz im still schooling. That is why i get furious whenever friends say thier problem is worst even when they are actually living in luxury. People which had nt been through poverty will not understand OUR pain. I noe few of u out there is nodding ur head with me, which is why i believe people who had been through bitterness and hardship will be polished to a better and stronger person. Some people can tell me your problem is not worse then mine, i fail my O's. HAVE I NOT BEEN THROUGH THAT ? HOW CAN I NOT NOE ? I cant believe they can actually still argue with me .. they are reflecting a image upon themselves which shows how immature and naive they are. I dont like to shoot people right into thier face becuz i respect them as a friend but if u cross over my limit, i assure u im not a person to mess with, considering it verbally or physically. My gd buddies will noe this point of me very well. I want to thank you guys for reading my pour-out post. < = ) I feel much much better now. A final piece of advice, when u guys start a family in the future, be responsible and mature. Because it is usually the children who suffers, especially the only child.

`tomato squashed @ 11:43 PM